残念

大家好~又是一阵子没有回来了~==
最近我还是很忙，而且更忙，而且非常忙。。。。（绝望）
我现在的样子很“残”痘痘在我脸上快乐地奔跳，
我的头发也是一pek耶酱，
星期五那天起身眼睛睁不开所以戴眼镜去上学，
而且还是四分裤+拖鞋，同学都叫我aunty lydia,
我有几堕落已经不想再讲==
幸好有BBcream的发明我才不用出去吓人，感恩 囧
很多final group project,很多考试，真的很难顶，
星期一又要去朋友hostel过夜了，唉
真的很怕stop motion project赶不出来，星期四就要交了，囧
我要叫我的万能青蛙帮我很多下，我这个原始人，一动电脑就GG-_-太绝望了。。

唉

流水账

最近严重睡眠不足，
不是没有得睡而是一直发梦睡不好D；
今天坐车去学院（对的，我驾车很恐怖，还没有办法驾去sunway），
一路坐到去那边竟然都还没有醒-_-
我整个人梦游酱进班，zs讲第一次看我这样，
而ch讲我经常是这样“O”face==
转得很硬其实只是要继续笑我的圆脸~urghh

然后我最近一直kacao青蛙，
我开始对“不是非常熟”的人anti-social，
一如往常地围起我的小圈圈~（沁会知道我的毛病 囧）
青蛙最近很忙，而我。。。不懂怎样讲，
不知道我的时间怎样跑出来去kacao青蛙的，有心就什么都可以=="
然后青蛙很wai，gek我好像变成跟我沟通的乐趣，
他不是拿其他女生gek就是敷衍我-_-
青蛙继续忙他的功课，他很serious我很怕D；
原来我上个sem就是这个样子，做功课做到出神入化lol（想不到更好的成语）
是有点恐怖啦，不过为了自己的前途也只好如此o_o
然后今天jenn和lynn突然来给我洗脑，
一开始我很接受不到，一直觉得他们是不是在鄙视我没有资格进illus，
然后我就很pekcek酱paint到很燥郁，那些布都敷衍了事:(后悔下
过后jenn进一步解释，其实他们也只是关心我咯。
连我喜欢什么我自己都讲不出，当然会使人担心。

我的生活很像一场梦（或是分很多场），常常都要问自己在做什么，却从来都找不到答案，做事情从来不需要原因和重点:(
"Not good enough"是我进TOA一来一直重复指责自己的话，
不过一直指责自己又有什么用？
明知道自己怎样都比不过别人，
人家比你早多少画画，人家基础有多好，
你还是做好自己的本分啦，那些作品拿来激励下参考下就算liao.

噢很久没有blog流水账，讲了一堆废话给自己听，
原谅我的思绪一直跳来跳去，想到什么就打什么，
原来还有三个星期就sem break liao eh，很多final啊，不可以现在放弃好吗？:(

stuck

Well, after attending church on friday my temper seems to get in control+apology from timgaizok :D
Btw, actually i'm still stuck in sadness, have no idea why,
have been thinking plenty of reason,
1, self pity by my flu and cough
2, seriously need holidays
My holiday doesn't mean stuck at home,
I'm already stuck at home for days, beside go college+buy bread from king(opposite my house)+buy bread from tesco(lol, always muz use buy bread as excuse to go out, still super near from my home)+go church
I can sense my soul dying in this house..
I should admit that my parents doesn't seems like to have outings anymore, they love to stay at home? 囧 (due to old age maybe, they want to rest..) and i become like a burden always wanting to get out,(and use buy bread as excuse, lol)
My secondary school buddies need to study, time not match..no ppl accompany me at all..
I'm feel so alone every single day staying at home kacao-ing my dog, with my dad reading newspaper beside as the scene..|||

D;

share share:

Idiots

I am fed up of everything and fed up of controlling my temper.
I need to say out, someone just never look at their own self and never change.

I hate those idiots who thought they know everything,
I hate those idiots who teasing others and pretend to be open and humble actually they are completely proud but they don't know,
I hate those idiots who thought that i don't know anything and look down on me asking me to shit off away and wait the so called brilliants to solve it,
I hate those who murmurs and grumbles without knowing that is actually its own fault,
I hate those who only know how to say beautifully but do nothing.

You idiot all have no right to correct me as you are also imperfect, only God have the right to correct me.

Stop your yelling and stupid voice, don't you know that your voice is loud and it seriously irritates me, you are not in a fight idiot,
my fire come whenever i hear your voice, it's irritating,
yell as much as you can until you make me deaf if not just shut your stupid mouth up.

I completely fed up and tired, i am willing to curse the whole world just to gain back my peace,
I'm sick and having flu,
I tired, left me alone,
go away, all stupid idiots go away,
can't you see that i'm tired and emotional?
GO AWAY. LEFT ME ALONE.

I can't face it and i'm angry, just because i'm sick and tired.

Release

Share a touching video that lecturer show us this afternoon.


And i saw some good post from: http://vcwanyi.blogspot.com/2011/07/blog-post.html

--翻回旧部落格发现从前的自己真的很啰嗦，没事写一大堆有的没的。除了自己估计没人能看懂(。・_・) 想法还是有，逻辑也还在。只是心态似乎越来越矛盾，越来越难揣摩*我是说我自己*。心想既然矛盾，那就藏起来吧；既然不容易揣摩，那就甭瞎猜吧。于是藏着藏着，甭着甭着...就这样了 (＠_＠)

文字和我，在各自习惯了沉淀以后，渐行渐远。*简称变得很不熟*
不过也好，阔别了彷徨少年时的不安与轻狂，我想我已不再需要依赖煽情和深奥(and emo)的文字。

我一直很清楚自己 需要 什么，却始终没弄懂自己真正 想要 些什么。--

I feel like crying once i watched it, but i don't,
i'm really afraid and still continue keep to myself,
my every conversation sounds physical and extraordinarily official,
I guess some of my friends started to realize that i keep everything private and i don't never tell,
actually it does not really feels good when i keep everything to myself,
comes to a time, i realize,
there are no one to talk and i not even dare to tweet it.
Just because i can't stand how people look at me, not even a glance,
and it's getting more and more serious.

I'm sick and confuse. I don't wa
nt to do work, i need a break badly.

乱绪

'_'

噢耶，昨天的driving test终于都pass liao,
昨天还有一点点开心，今天就boh feel了。
昨天真的是很够力紧张，比第一次还紧张，
因为我已经不能承受第二次的失败了囧
一如往常我一紧张就会肚子痛，很想去上厕所，
可是一考完就不想上了，
得知自己pass liao也没有笑出来，
因为我还处于紧张状态，
不过有点感动到想哭出来的感觉 =_="

然后，从昨天pass了我就一直blur到今天。。==!
不懂是不是紧张到消耗太多精神，
我的脑好像不见掉酱，一直躲起来，要很用力想才找到囧
hang下hang下就是我现在的情况，
好累耶 o_o 很久没有好好出门了，
本来还想昨天如果pass了我可以下午约中学死党去pavilion吃我亲爱的snowflake，
可是一如往常地我只有"想”没有做，
依然归咎于“懒”字，
害我到中午终于无聊到不行而极度后悔自己错失了这个良机囧

今天觉得自己pull down了整组人，
我出的idea行不行？下个星期就知道了。。
我回到家后午觉睡不着一直在担心自己出的那个idea,
我不想害人害己咯 TAT 希望我不是没有贡献的人。

我就要在家里wat sei leh...。

碎碎碎碎念

我不知道自己要写什么，
纯粹无聊而经过这里打打字。

其实我不是很忙，忙里偷闲已经变成了我的专长，
秘诀是，提早做，一有时间就做，
而我是一个星期7天，7天都在做功课 囧
青蛙讲我有职业病，天天都讲我不正常，
整天叫我去tanjung rambutan lol，衰到。
不过也对的，只要一天没有做功课我就会周身不舒服，
如果我在外边我的心会一直飞去我的功课桌去，
其实我没那么有上进心，即使看起来很勤劳，
其实我真的很少做多余的练习 囧
我做的，真的都只是“功课”而已，要交的，算分的，
傻的，做功课都差点没时间，
才没有那么得空去做多余的事，
除非我的分数惨不忍睹就只好硬着头皮多加努力咯。

其实生活很无聊，烦恼的，来来去去都是一样的问题，
都还没有解决，pls啦，可以快点解决吗-_-很sien liao。

噢我语无伦次咯，最近一直在找戏看啦，
以前看一部好戏会回味很久，现在看什么都boh feel，
算了啦。

Should i dated my bed?
不是很想咯，我想游泳D；
坐在车子里其实是一件很浪费时间的事情，
赶快发明任意门啦。

漠视这篇，谢谢:p